A bad Good Morning

This morning. Raining.... I can hear the pulsating beats of the raindrops falling upon the pavement. Who would have know that my body would synchronize and let tears flow at the same consistency?
I got attached toy you. I shouldn't have. It is all my fault. Not yours. But now you want me to forget you as if it were all just a dream. I cant do that. You want me to move on and not stay attached. I hold your secret behind the walls of my chest, right next to my heart. You think that we can just go 8 months with out contact, communication, nothing, and forget eachother? I cant forget you. That's just wrong. I fell for it.
The lust.
The cuteness.
The ego.
The smiles.
The tears.
The art.
The games.
The movies.
The jokes.
The similarities.
The fun.
The texting.
The picturemail.
The metaphysical.
The love.
The joy.
All too good to be true. My friend. My friend is going to a place where he could not come back from. My friend is going so far away we wont be able to communicate. My friend is going so far away. Will my love reach? Will I be with my friend always?
My chest has been hurting all day. Right in the center. The middle of me on the right side of my heart. Is this what heart ache feels like? The bitterness of my past has come back with a vengeance. Like venom. Like poison. Destroying every dream. Every piece of happiness I have gained back since Feb 20th. The pain from last July. The 18th to be exact. The flashbacks of running back up those stairs ending up in tears and no one to call my love. The nights I spent alone. Still alone. Always alone. I wasn't alone. I slept with you on my mind and in my heart. But now my friend you will be leaving me in 9 weeks. For 8 months and maybe 8months more. What am I to do? For now I am speechless....